Letter to a New Mother
Your moods and emotions may span the spectrum of the rainbow. One day you may feel sweet like the pinks and coral tones. Another day you may be deep and quiet like the blues of the sea. And sometimes you’ll rage red and brown, like a forest fire. Your motherhood is unique to you, a daily work in progress.
Striving for motherhood perfection is based on achieving our cultural, mental idea of what a “perfect” mother is…It’s truly a mind f-ck.
The perfect mother for your children is who YOU are, not who someone else says you should be, or the version of saintly or hip mothering that you constantly compare yourself to.
Every mother – just like every person on this planet – can evolve and improve herself. But at the core, in the deep place where you love your children, you are WHOLE. And that is what matters most to your baby and to your children.
The heart of motherhood is sharing your LOVE, PRESENCE and BEING-NESS
When you doubt your capability, are weary from the moment-to-moment demands, feel inadequate to give the best to your child…just PAUSE. Look at your deeply caring Self and cherish her for trying, for caring, for worrying. Extend mercy to yourself for being a human being who gets exhausted and sometimes wants to escape, give up, not care, or disappear.
Becoming a mother puts us face to face with our limitations. We see clearly that we are an imperfect human being – fragile, vulnerable, flawed. And yet we are also powerful creators, caregivers, mentors, advocates, and protectors of another human life. We are all these things, sometimes moving from one state to another from minute to minute.
BREATHE. The wildly changing nature of mothering is normal – it’s true! – and we are also MORE: We are the BIG LOVE behind the wild changing.
Mari is a licensed practitioner of Chinese medicine, a singer/songwriter and the creator of Mamashine. She is also a survivor of postpartum depression. Mari lives with her energetic son, her husband and various animals in Austin, TX.